Friday, July 06, 2007

When you can't make it all better

Well, I finally had a real conversation w/ Chuck on Tuesday - two, actually. And he got to talk to the kids. Chuck's getting his ass kicked b/c he is working so many long hours with minimal sleep and the physical exertion is not what he is used to. He seems to be adjusting, and may get pissed that I even wrote this, but I am honest when I write here! (Sorry, Honey!)

Life is hectic and the kids really miss their Daddy! Poor Adelle is whining more often than usual and cries like nobody's business (then she adamately denies that she was crying - go figure!). Granted, she is only four years old and is just now at the age when she realizes when Daddy (or Mommy) is away "too long." I do my best to comfort her, but she always asks when Daddy will be home. "August" I tell her. But August is not in her line of vision at her age. I guess I need to break down and do the countdown thing. Unfortunately, I don't know exactly when SHE will see Chuck (I'm flying out to Ft. Lewis to drive back with him).

As a mother I find it quite painful to not be able to "make it all better." When Chuck was deployed she was only two so her sense of time was just from one minute to the next. And now Creighton is 7 and he understands that Daddy is gone for a while, but he's older and has a better grasp on the whole thing. Does it make it easier for him? Probably not, but his understanding is much better overall.

This morning in the car Adelle asked me "Mommy, why did the Army need Daddy to go to Ft. Lewis, WA" (yes, she knows that's where he is)? "Because it's part of his job" I said. Then Creighton (God love him) piped in with his own explanation about Daddy training other soldiers and also learning new things and sometimes he has to go to other places. Talk about wanting to cry!!! UGH!

Single-parenthood in the military is quite an animal. I have MUCHO respect for all single parents, military or not (my mom raised 4 kids as a single parent). You would think it got easier as the kids got older... I am finding out otherwise! I know my kids will be okay and I'm not concerned that the military lifestyle will "hurt" them. But it hurts as a parent when

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